Nicole

Audio art is something I never really thought about creating before. I’m a very visual person and because of this it can sometimes be difficult for me to imagine a situation without a visual representation. For this project, I wanted to challenge myself and see if I can tell a story by only using sounds.

I recently watched a Filipino movie called “Meet, Greet, & Bye”. It’s about a family and their mother battling cancer. Filipino movies never fails to make me cry because they almost always revolve around family and the relatable struggles they overcome. This of course became a big inspiration for the story I wanted to tell, along with being home for the break and spending a short time with my mom again.

Whenever I see my mother’s face it’s a reminder of the time we didn’t get to spend with each other and the uncertainty of time we have left together. But, I also think about the time I need to grow by myself without my mom always by my side. I know we both feel like we need to make up for the time she was gone so It’s a constant back and forth between the anxiety of loosing her or the known feeling of loosing myself. What better way to express these thoughts by using a single word said in many ways. Mama.

I was originally going to call this piece “Ma” because every Filipino knows that’s the most Pinoy way to call your mom. I ended up changing it because it no longer felt like just Ma, it felt like Ma and Child. I believe the title “First Word” reflects both words better.

I knew I would not be able to record my actual moms voice for many reasons, so I chose to do the next best thing which is to ask my Filipino friend to record in the studio with me. I was in the recording studio for about 4 hours and half of it was with my friend Leila. She also grew up in the Philippines and moved a few year ago to Canada with her family, I asked her because we have very similar experiences and she can also speak the language fluently. Plus I think her voice is very mature sounding. We recorded over 60 recordings in both Tagalog and English. I wanted to include a English version because I believe that understanding can be an important part of feeling the emotion of the piece. Instead of putting subtitles to a black screen I decided to keep it fully auditory and create a similar piece in another language. Although, I much prefer the outcome of the Filipino version because it portrayed the emotions I originally imagined and it hits me in a personal level.

Editing was a very long process but I wanted to make sure I added enough to create the proper atmosphere for each setting of the timeline. One addition that made this piece much more personal for me was using a violin cover of the song “MAPA” by SB19. This song also never fails to make me cry so it was only appropriate to include it. It’s a song that shows appreciation to the Parents, Ma and Pa, and their sacrifices for their children. Although, this song was not part of my original plan, the words I say at the end fits perfectly with the last words of the song. A happy little accident 🙂